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Archive for trust

Feeling Squeezed?

Tuesday, August 2nd, 2011

"After every storm the sun will smile; for every problem there is a solution, and the soul's indefeasible duty is to be of good cheer." ~ William R. Alger

When I first started my speaking business, I relied heavily on one-on-one coaching clients to supplement my speaking revenue (which was understandably not much in the beginning of my speaking career, before anyone really knew who I was). I am an ICF accredited coach and, while it's not my passion, at that time it proved a great way to pay the bills while I built my speaking career. I consistently worked with anywhere from fifteen to twenty clients each week.

Then something strange happened. In one month, half of my clients quit. It wasn't that they were dissatisfied, it just worked out that they were ready to move on without coaching, that our work together was done, or that they couldn't afford to continue. Suddenly, I found myself wondering what the heck was going on and worse, how on earth I was going to pay my bills. My coaching business was literally "drying up" right before my eyes, and I had no idea why.

I was sharing my fear with a friend one day when she said something I'll never forget. "Looks like God is opening up space in your life for something really big. Change is coming, so get ready." I had no idea what that "something big" might be, but it made me look at that particular challenging situation differently. I was able to see that, while right now felt really challenging, there was surely a light at the end of the tunnel. Sure enough, within a few weeks, my phone started ringing off the hook with inquiries about my speaking services. Seems a leader with whom I was working had gone to her company's executive summit, stood up in a room full of other executives, and raved about what a great live training I'd just done for her group. Now all of a sudden I was in demand. If I'd still had a full slate of coaching clients, it would have been impossible for me to meet the new demands on my time.

The quote at the top of this post may sound a little "pollyanna-ish," but give me a second to elaborate. It's the times in my life when I'm feeling the most overwhelmed that often end up being the ones I look back on with the most gratitude. Without fail, when things seem challenging or I'm facing change (which is never easy and which we as human beings tend to avoid whenever possible because it's uncomfortable), it means something bigger and better is coming to me.

Nature uses a birth canal to bring about new life. If you've ever seen a brand new baby, you know often times they are so squeezed that their heads are misshapen. Butterflies must emerge from their cocoons by squeezing with all their might out of a small opening and into the air. They emerge completely exhausted, but the process of being squeezed literally wicks the moisture away from their fragile new wings and allows them to fly. If you help a butterfly by tearing the cocoon open, it will die. It must experience the stress of the change in order to evolve to the next level.
 
If you’re feeling squeezed right now, it is because something is seeking to be born in you. Growth and change is never easy, but is always fruitful and worth the work. And what I know for sure is that just knowing this, understanding that challenge never happens in a vacuum and that something better is on it's way, changes the way you look at challenge in your life. The next time you're frustrated by challenging circumstances you're experiencing or you're wondering why things are so difficult, stop and imagine exactly why you're life is being altered. What are you making room for or moving toward?

Sometimes that can turn a challenge into an adventure. It might not make it any easier, but it definitely changes your mindset as you navigate each challenge on your way to your new (even if it is undetermined) destination.



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You may, as long as you do not alter it and include the following information (with active links as appropriate):

Julie Anne Jones is direct sales corporate consultant, coach, and trainer, and the CEO of Julie Anne Jones, Inc. She is known for her authentic and easy-to-use scripting and specializes in specific language and tools for success in direct sales. To learn more about Julie Anne and her products and services, and to read her weekly blog posts, visit her at www.julieannejones.com.

 

Video Blog: Take a Leap of Faith!

Thursday, May 27th, 2010

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“Just Be Yourself”

Tuesday, March 9th, 2010

“Just be yourself!” Has anyone ever said that to you? I heard it all the time when I was a kid, followed by assurances from my mother that everyone would like me if I could (just be myself). And you know what? She was right! What I’m told over and over again in my travels as a trainer and as I interact through social media is that people love my authenticity. I “show up” as who I am, whether I’m on stage or off. I’m honest about my faults as often as I am about my strengths. And I’ve found that people feel like they know me and can communicate with me because of it.

The other thing I consciously do which I believe assures people of my authenticity is so simple it’s almost crazy. I ask questions and, more importantly, I listen. That’s it.

One of the keys to authenticity is realizing that, sometimes (believe it or not), it’s not about you. You see, as members of the human race, whether we admit it to ourselves or not, we think it’s all about us. Especially if you’re enthusiastic about your company and its products and all it has done for you, sharing that from your perspective is natural. The problem with that is, the person you’re talking to wants it to be about them!

As a direct seller, your most important job is building relationships. You do that through conversation and the best way to build a strong, positive relationship with another person is through supportive communication (which means they feel important and heard).

So why not make the conversation about them? Shift your focus to curiosity and away from asking for anything. If you’re curious, you’re bound to ask questions, which will lead the person with whom you’re talking to share.

And when you’re curious, when you make it all about them, your authenticity shines through. It’s impossible to be curious and listen to someone else if you’re not also being authentic. And believe me when I tell you, people can tell the difference between being truly listened to and talking to someone who’s just marking time waiting for their turn to talk. You know you can tell the difference.

When you shift your thinking to this perspective and you learn to authentically listen, you’ll find you magically begin to get everything you need. It’s a truly incredible phenomenon.



WANT TO USE THIS ARTICLE FOR FREE IN PRINT OR ONLINE?

You may, as long as you do not alter it and include the following information (with active links as appropriate):

Julie Anne Jones is a success language consultant, a direct sales coach and trainer, and the CEO of Julie Anne Jones, Inc. She is known for her authentic and easy-to-use scripting and specializes in specific language and tools for success in direct sales. To learn more about Julie Anne and her products and services, and to read more blog posts, visit her at www.julieannejones.com.